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LA: Hello, Dr. Duvreau. Can you tell us more about pedogerms?

DD: Akin to pedophiles, they like young children. It’s fairly self-evident.

LA: What can we do to protect ourselves?

DD: Very little.

LA: Dear Sir, is there anything else we should know?

DD: I refuse to say anything else on the matter. I’m upset.

LA: Yes, I wasn’t going to raise that issue. But a few prominent academics, including MIT’s own Noam Chomsky, have publicly repudiated some of your research. We haven’t had an opportunity to hear your side on this. Would you like to respond to the critics?

DD: He be warned, since arrogance may lead to saying the wrong thing to the wrong individual. Then the next thing that’s understood is the profuse bleeding of a punctured abdomen, the poor critic thinking about their Mother’s vagina, saying, “Oh Mama. Oh Mama. Oh Mama.”



Dr. Douglas Duvreau is leader of Doug Bless You (a polygamist organisation), chairperson of the AIDS Academic Institute (AAI), and professor and researcher at LAU.

LA University researchers have discovered a new disease-producing microorganism coined as pedogerms. LA caught up with Dr. Douglas Duvreau, LAU’s disease specialist.

Pedophile Special

After having spent much of her pregnancy relaxing in a hot tub, LaQuonda Goins gave birth to a boiled egg.

Students in Athens rioted when the bars closed a hour early due to time changes to Daylight Savings. Over 1000 people were said to have rioted. Police officers were injured and countless were arrested. Now, a toast to the future.

Flash News

When Child Rape is Okay

LA: What’s happening, Mister LeBeau? Saying “In the darkness, I think of you,” to your daughter is particular, to say the least. Can you clarify what you meant?

DL: God damn. I meant she’s the light source for me in darker times. I’m not a sexual deviant. I love my daughter.

LA: “I love my daughter.” What do you mean by that?

DL: What do you mean, what do I mean?

LA: What do you mean?

DL: I mean I love my daughter!

LA: Well, that may be inappropriate, Sir. She’s just a child.

DL: God damn, this world’s gone crazy.



Disclaimer:

Dave LeBeau is NOT affiliated in any way with Lemon Antifreeze or any of its members or organisations. The representations expressed within this interview are those of Dave LeBeau and do not reflect the opinions and viewpoints of Lemon Antifreeze. The information, ideas, and activities set forth by Dave LeBeau should not be construed as being endorsed by Lemon Antifreeze for any purpose.

These are the words that got a Saskatoon father in legal trouble. Dave LeBeau’s currently facing sexual charges for sharing his controversial thoughts with his 10-year-old daughter. LA, having gotten a hold of LeBeau, asked him if he could explain his side of the story

Pedogerms

In the Darkness, I Think of You

While pedophilic rape’s hideousness is undisputable, one possibility remains open, one that all can agree with, from priests to parents:


Caillou.


Someone rape the mediocrity out of this cancerous child during the Super Bowl half-time show.


Please and thank you.